Parent – So you’re saying that people who blame others have less motivation to change their behavior?
Dr. B – Well, yeah. If the problem resides elsewhere – what’s to change?
Parent – Guess that makes sense. But sometimes other people really are to blame.
Dr. B – Sure. But what would you think if your kid always had someone to blame when things went wrong?
Parent – I’d say he wasn’t ‘manning up’.
Dr. B – And your daughter? Does she ‘man up’?
Parent – Yeah. More than her brother.
Dr. B – I think you need a new term for taking responsibility.
Parent – Yeah. She told me. So is our minute up?
Dr. B – Got somewhere you need to be?
Parent – Well, it’s usually about now that you want me to start thinking differently about something and taking more responsibility.
Dr. B – Really? You only do that when I’m around?
Parent – Yeah. I’m kind of a do as I’m told, not as I should kind of guy.
Dr. B – At least you are honest.
Parent – When you are around, I am.
Dr. B – Ugh.
Parent – So how do I use this with my kids?
Dr. B – After you listen to their excuses or blaming, ask them what they could have done differently.
Parent – That works.
