Parent A – My patience is at an end. I’m tired of these indirect approaches to my son’s lack of effort in school.
Dr. B – What would you like to do?
Parent A – Besides sit him down in the kitchen each night and check his homework? Take away the video games. Take away his phone …
Dr. B – Kind of like a reeducation camp?
Parent A – Your sarcasm is not welcome. I’m really frustrated.
Dr. B – I can tell. Your impulse is to take away the games and toys. Do you think those interfere with school?
Parent A – If he spends that many hours gaming and using his phone, how can he get any work done?
Dr. B – So there seems to be a direct relationship between hours spent playing and lack of hours spent working?
Parent A – Yeah. I think it’s obvious.
Dr. B – So it is not just a correlation; it’s causal?
Parent A – What are you getting at with this ‘correlation is not causation’ stick?
Dr. B – So you know what I’m asking?
Parent A – Yeah. You’re questioning whether the time spent gaming causes the lack of effort in school. Or you are wondering whether he wants to avoid school and video gaming is a good way to do that?
Dr. B – I could not have said it more clearly.
Parent A – What do you propose I do then, Sir Isaac?
Dr. B – A body at play in a video game tends to stay at play?
Parent A – Yeah. You got it.
Dr. B – Well, why don’t you let your son in on your theory and test it?
Parent A – What do you mean?
Dr. B – I assume if you tell your son that you think his gaming causes him to neglect his school work, he will dispute that?
Parent A – For sure.
Dr. B – So, ask him to prove it.
Parent A – How do I do that?
Dr. B – Ask him to design an experiment that tests your hypothesis.
Parent A – So what is he going to do? Stop playing video games for a week as well as not studying to prove me wrong?
B – I don’t know. You’re saying there’s going to be experimenter bias? I think it would be interesting to see what he comes up with.
Parent A – Ok. I’ll do that.
(two weeks later)
Dr. B – You are back. What did you and your son come up with?
Parent A – Well, my son may be an unmotivated student, but he will make a good lawyer someday.
Dr. B – Ha. I can’t wait to hear this.
Parent A – Naturally, he did not buy the notion that video gaming caused him to neglect school. He just said, “School is not that important and he’s doing good enough”. I wanted to jump in and ask more about the not important and good enough comments, but I decided to stick with the lab experiment.
Dr. B – So what did you guys come up with?
Parent A – He said the idea was lame, but if it would help calm me down (which I took to mean shut me up), then he would go along with it – under one condition. Whatever he had to do, I had to do.
Dr. B – Smart kid.
Parent A – We agreed that we would both go one week without electronics.
Dr. B – Cold Turkey? No way!
Parent A – See what a father’s love can do?
Dr. B – A father’s last desperate act is what I would label it. Anyway. Can’t wait to hear how this turned out. Who caved first?
Parent A – We agreed to two half hour slots when we could check our mail and texts. Otherwise, we put our gear in a Tupperware Tub and gave it to the Warden.
Dr. B – You guys really were serious. How did you both get your real-life work done?
Parent A – I used the computer at work and he did the same at school.
Dr. B – Geez. This is like an Iron Man Competition.
Parent A – We both followed through with the challenge.
Dr. B – And the results?
Parent A – I rediscovered my interest in reading books and writing.
Dr. B – And your son?
Parent A – He got his old Lego’s out and built some pretty amazing contraptions.
Dr. B – So, no change in the school work effort?
Parent A – Not that I could tell. And not that he willingly admitted.
Dr. B – Did you really think if you took his video games away he’d go rushing back into the arms of his Algebra book?
Parent A – Not when you say it like that.
Dr. B – So where does that leave you?
Parent A – Well, he proved me wrong on the causation thing, I guess, but something interesting came of it. We kind of have a little bond going, having both survived the week in the electronic desert.
Dr. B – Kind of a Band of Brother’s war buddies’ bond?
Parent A – Whatever, it’s allowed us to talk more openly about school and effort.
Dr. B – Wow. Who’da thought.
Parent A – Obviously you didn’t.
